Monday, March 7, 2011

I Have


I went to see the rheumatologist last week. I've been missing in action on all three of my blogs, and I've felt guilty about it. I've missed posting. But I've been so very sick and tired.

I'm like the lady on the commercials for Lyrica. As a matter of fact, that's one of the many prescriptions I now keep on my desk.

I take several more.

Want to feel "old"? Walk out of the pharmacy with a giant brown paper grocery bag filled with your medications!

So, what is Fybromyalgia, anyway? Well, I'm learning more about it each day. I'm already compiling a list of questions to ask my doctor next time I see him (in a month).

Will it get worse? Is it a progressive disease?

Will the medications stop working after a while?

Fibromyalgia is a neurological disorder when a person's brain sends out too many pain receptors...or something like that. Basically, it means that I feel more pain than the average person. And by more, I mean excruciating at times.

I feel like my bones are sick.

I ache.

I hurt.

I am constantly exhausted.

I sleep twelve to fourteen hours a day.

I get bad headaches that take three doses of medicine to go away.

I forget simple words. Like SALT. I forget appointments.

My joints hurt. My muscles hurt. My skin hurts.

But not all the time. And not always all at once. And not in the same places every time, either.

Right now, I feel pretty good.

So I'm here, writing to you. And later, I'm even planning on sharing a recipe on my cooking blog. As long as my energy holds up.

And if it doesn't? I'll just let myself crawl into bed and watch some garbage on Netflix, snuggled between two comforters and a fleece blanket.

And I'll try again tomorrow.


  1. Oh, I had no idea! I read your posts and you always sound so happy, so full of energy and gusto. Fibro is a complicated disorder, and affects everything in your life. I'm sure it's not a lot of consolation when you hurt so much, but I'm glad at least you have a doctor who believes you and respects you rather than just dismissing your symptoms. Sending all good thoughts and wishes and prayers -- may today be a good day for you ... :)

  2. Wow. Michelle, I'm so sorry you're going through this ... and feeling like this ... and having to learn about pain and medication and illness. That sucks.

    My mom has fibromyalgia. It was, for a very long time, misunderstood and thought to be in one's head. It's hard because the person looks fine, but they aren't underneath. I'm glad you're at least getting this news at a time when the medical community knows more about it and how to treat it.

    I imagine it's nice to be getting some answers and some help to explain the reason for the things you are feeling, but it's gotta be a blow in many other ways. I hope you are patient with yourself. I hope you take time to feel what you're feeling. And I hope you find some ways to feel better, if even a little at a time.

    Thanks for such an honest, open, real post. It's brave of you to share.

  3. Oh Michelle, I'm so sorry for you!!! I'm glad that you have a diagnosis so they can start to fix you. One day at a time my friend!! ((((HUGS))))!

  4. Sorry about what you are going through. Rest and relax when you can!

  5. Thank you both. :) The good thing about it is that there are good days, like today.

  6. I've had fibromyalgia for 18 years. The great thing about being diagnosed nowadays is that there are actual treatments for it. When I was diagnosed at 16, there was essentially nothing. I love Lyrica! It can be a bit sedating at first, but that should dissipate after a while. I've found that regular exercise (walking, swimming, and light weights) helps me feel better, but there is an initial pain spike that lasts a couple weeks. Fibro is no fun, but it is something you can live with and manage!

  7. Have you ever read Tawra's blog "Living on a Dime" She has this disease and shares many of her experiences. You might check it out. She has delt with this for years (her mother has it too I think) and she shares what works for her and what does not etc.
    Sorry you are in pain. I hope the medications can help with the pain. No one should live in pain.

  8. Oh, Michelle, I am so sorry to hear this. I have a friend who has fibromyalgia so I have an idea of what you are going through. Hang in there, my friend. My thoughts and prayers are with you!
    (((((((HUGS))))))) Take care of you!

  9. Praying that you will start to feel better soon! Don't worry about the lack of posts we all understand. Post when you can. Hugs to you!


  10. I'm so sorry to learn of your struggle. Trust your meds will work and you'll be feeling stronger soon. ... I have family who deal with's tough but you can do it! May the good Lord be very near to you during this tough time.

  11. I miss your posts. Hoping you get some relief from your pain soon. Will look forward to future posts when you're up and at 'em. In the meantime, take care.